Find Freedom - Matthew 26

A lot of you know that I was a pastor’s kid growing up. My wife and I used to have conversations about which was worse - growing up homeschooled or growing up as a pastor’s kid, so we looked at our kids and thought “both, let’s do both” - just giving them NO chance to turn out normal. (pause) No, it’s okay - have you seen what the world counts as normal these days? No thanks. Hard pass. But growing up as a pastors’ kid, plus I’m the oldest kid - and what that means is that my default setting is legalism. I am so good at following rules. You give me a rule - I will stay inside that box so hard. And probably the strongest version of this is my relationship with the truth. And I remember, one time I was about 6 years old and my church went to a Christian Rock Festival called Ichthus. Same festival where I would give my life to Jesus Christ 8 years later, but at 6 years old - I didn’t really know what was going on, we were just camping in the mud. But we go to this festival, and a bunch of families from our church would come along. And everybody had separate tents or RV’s or whatever for sleeping - but we would have a central tent over where we would do meals together as a church. And one night we were having tacos. Now I have always loved tacos, that’s never changed. And we’re getting in line, and I’m just geeked to be getting some tacos. And the lady next to me in line, she was one of the adults who helped with the kids and she looked down at little 6 year old me, quivering with excitement. And so she asks me, “Do you like tacos?” Yes I do! And then she asked, “How many tacos do you think you can eat?” And it’s sort of ridiculous that I remember this, but I looked up at this lady. Her name was Suzie, and I remember I said, “Ten! I can eat ten tacos.” Now most of us, when we hear a six year old claim to eat ten tacos we think in our heads, “That is just so cute how they exaggerate like that.” Not me. I was consumed with guilt. Because that’s the first time I remember intentionally lying. I’m sure I did it before that, but this is the one that is burned into my memory. I’d never eaten ten tacos - those are crazy numbers. I was putting away two maybe three tacos max. Poor Suzie has fallen for my falsehood. She’s out here believing that I’m this epic taco eater. I was just sure that she was out there telling all her friends about the amazing 6 year old who could eat ten tacos. I spent the rest of the evening consumed with guilt. I told a lie to make myself look more impressive to an adult. What kind of monster does that? And I wish I was making this up - that little lie bothered me for YEARS. I’m not a liar - well, there was that one time with the tacos. 

And I know that story makes people giggle. It’s ridiculous for a kid to get so upset about something so mundane. But let me ask you - when’s the last time you felt convicted about your life? Like, you look honestly at your life, and you look at the life Jesus wants you to live, right? The life of the person you should be - and you become aware of how far apart those two lives are? In my time as a pastor, I have had the privilege to walk alongside a lot of people as we try to figure out how to follow Jesus together. And I think the people who do the best with conviction are the drug addicts. People in recovery, who have gone through a hard thing and given up a major vice - they have such a great relationship with conviction. I’ve had a lot of friends struggle with alcoholism, substance abuse. I had a friend who got addicted to pain killers after a back surgery, another who thought he could never belong in a church because he went to jail when he was younger because of his heroin problem. There was a guitarist in the worship band of one of my churches and he was 12 years sober from alcohol, it was amazing the change in his life. His daughter used to talk about how different he was from when she was little. I remember in my first church, there was a kid who was in and out of prison constantly - got to do my first jail visits with him. I think he’s about 8 years clean at this point. I remember the grandma who struggled a lot when she was younger - and now she’s in church every Sunday praising Jesus’ name for setting her free and praying that her kids and grandkids don’t follow in her footsteps. 

Now I open with these two extremes - tacos and hard drugs - because probably all of you in the room are somewhere in the middle. When I ask, “when’s the last time you felt convicted?” Some of you can shrug it off - because you feel your issues are just a little thing. No biggie. But on the other hand, some of you can’t even think about it, because it’s such an oppressive shadow on your shoulder. Conviction can become crippling. So what I want to do now - I’m going to read you a passage from the bible. It’s in Romans 7, but I don’t want you to turn to it. I just want you to hear these words and ask yourself the question, “what is it for me? When I hear these words, what comes to mind from MY life?” [SLOWLY read Romans 7:15-24]. What is the thing in your life that makes you talk like that? [pause]

A lot of you know that we are in week two of our series called ROOTED, where we are looking at the life of probably the most famous disciple of Jesus, this guy Peter, to figure out how we should be disciples. And last week Brian got us started in the journey with the call of Peter. Peter was a fisherman, and Jesus called him - and he left his nets behind and began following Jesus. And I think one of the reasons Peter is the most famous disciple is because Peter was SO bad at it. He was constantly screwing up. He had to practice and learn, and it was hard for him. Like, do you ever have a friend who was just instantly good at everything? They’ve never touched a soccer ball before, and the first thing they do is that awesome bicycle kick over their head. Or they’ve never played piano, and they just sit down one time and they’re playing a concerto. Like - that’s not relatable! I don’t know how to learn from the guy who gets it right on the first try. I think for most of us - the journey to follow Jesus is a lot more like what we read in Romans. I want to do what’s right, but man, I keep screwing it up. And if you’re like me - and you identify with the guy who needs a second chance, the guy who means well - but makes a lot of mistakes - Peter is our GUY!  Peter’s stumbling efforts give us a road map for following Jesus.

If you want to grab your bibles, we are going to be in Matthew chapter 26, we’re going to pick up the story right after Jesus has supper with the disciples - and they do communion for the very first time, and then verse 30 is where I want to start. [read v.30]. I have read this story a bajillion times, and I never noticed that detail before. They sang a hymn. After celebrating the passover meal - they sang a hymn together. I wonder if Jesus had a good singing voice. To worship God, while sitting next to God (with Jesus sitting right next to you), I mean - what an incredible experience. They worship together, and then they head out to the Mount of Olives. It keeps going, [read v.31-32]. Now there’s two huge things in here: First - the disciples will desert Jesus. Jesus is telling them, “you’re going to mess up. You’re going to fall short. You’re going to get it wrong.”And that is a very important piece for all of us to realize, in our lives today. That at some point we are going to mess things up and walk away from Jesus. But in the very next sentence, Jesus is telling them how he’s going to fix it. “After I have been raised from the dead, I will go ahead of you to Galilee and meet you there.” Jesus gives them both the truth about sin AND the hope that comes with new life. I used to read those words as an accusation. Like Jesus was angry and attacking them, “You’re going to desert me and I want you to feel bad about it” - but reading it now, I see that’s not in there! It’s more like he’s just telling them, “hey - there’s going to be a moment when you’re going to make a mistake. You’re going to mess it up and run away from me when you shouldn’t. You’re going to abandon me, but I’m going to go over here and wait for you.” Jesus is telling them, “here is how you find your way back to me after a broken promise.” And what I want you to pull from this is that even if you have walked away from Jesus - even if you have abandoned his way of living, and broken a promise to him…he is waiting for you - ready to welcome you home.

But, of course, that’s not good enough for our buddy Peter. [read v.33-35]. There it is. I would die for you Jesus. It sounds so heroic. We attach that phrase to important things in our lives. I would die for my country. I would die for my family. I would die for you Jesus. But Peter’s got it upside down. Jesus is not asking us to die for him, he’s asking us to LIVE for him. Death is heroic, and also a cop out. I would die for my country - okay, great -  but will you live in a way that makes the country better? Will you love your neighbor in such a way that makes your town a better place to live? I would die for my family - great, but nobody is asking for that. They don’t need you to die for them, they need you to LIVE for them. Show up for them, help them with their homework, teach them how to brush their teeth. I would die for my wife. Yeah - I don’t think your wife is interested in that plan. I mean, maybe sometimes - but no! She doesn’t want you to die for her - she wants you to LIVE for her. To love her, provide for her, take care of yourself for her, show up for her. Peter says, “I would die for you Jesus,” but in the very next scene, Jesus asks Peter to stay awake and pray for him. I don’t need you to die for me, but can you pray for me? Nope - Peter falls asleep. Death sounds heroic, but that’s mostly Hollywood nonsense - what we need more than grand empty promises are transformed lives. Most of us would die for Jesus, but would we LIVE for him? That’s way harder.

Jesus gets arrested, Judas betrays him and it’s this horrible thing. But the story continues down in verse 69, [read v.69-72]. Do you hear how it’s getting stronger? First he says, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Then he says it with an oath, ‘I don’t even know the man” And then [read v.73-75]. Denial. Denial with an Oath. Denial with a curse. And in that moment Jesus’ words flashed through Peter’s mind. And the chapter ends with, “and he went away, weeping bitterly.” But here’s what I want you to catch - that rooster might be the greatest teaching Jesus ever gave to Peter. Those tears are probably the most important gift Jesus could have put in Peter’s life. This is going to sound super weird and backwards, but it is actually a GOOD thing when someone tells you about your sin. It is a GOOD thing when someone shows you an area where you still need to grow. I cannot imagine the pain that Peter felt when he heard that Rooster. He was reminded of his failure. He looked at his life and saw that he had broken his promise. He made a promise to never desert Jesus, to never deny him - and yet he did. He denied Jesus over and over in the same night. The rooster was a reminder, and it led to bitter tears - and those tears mean that Peter is halfway home. You cannot fix a problem if you won’t admit that it is there. You cannot be forgiven of sin if you’re not even aware of what you did! And so in that way, this brutal reminder is a gift! 

I think people get this mixed up a lot. Because last week was the call. Jesus calls Peter, put down your fishing nets, come and follow me, get to know me. If you guys want to grab those little magnets that are on the seats - you can see along the edges the process of learning how to follow Jesus. What we call the discipleship pathway. And the first step is to know God. And that’s a huge step. We accept God into our lives, we dedicate ourselves to following Jesus - maybe we make a profession of faith or get baptized. We give our lives to Jesus, but that’s just the beginning. The second step, if you follow along the outside of the magnet is to Find Freedom. But here’s the tricky part - you can only Find Freedom if you know what your shackles are made of. You cannot overcome sin and confess it and be forgiven and washed clean if you cannot even see it. You cannot find freedom if you have convinced yourself that your prison cell is actually your living room. Jesus gave Peter the GIFT of the rooster so that he would be reminded of his broken promise. Jesus reminded Peter of his sin, so that he would remember to come home. When we give our lives to Jesus and we say, “alright Lord, I’m here to follow you.” That’s the first step - but the next thing that happens is the Holy Spirit comes into our hearts and starts making changes - starts making us more like Jesus. Peter had a whole lifetime of his heart being changed. Most of you in this room have been transformed by the Holy Spirit over the years that you have followed Jesus. But what a lot of people don’t realize is that the first thing the Holy Spirit does when he shows up in your heart - is convict you. He reminds you of your sin, he helps you remember your broken promises - so that you will come back home to Jesus. 

But here’s what happens. The enemy will try to use conviction to lead you to shame. But I need you to hear me on this - Jesus never uses shame. Jesus is not interested in using the Holy Spirit to make you feel bad - he’s using the conviction of the Holy Spirit to BRING YOU HOME. Guilt is only the end game of the enemy, for Jesus guilt is just a catalyst. It is the thing designed to bring about change, not despair. Jesus never used shame. There’s actually a parallel story with Peter and Judas. Judas ALSO betrayed Jesus, he also abandoned him. But Judas let his betrayal lead him to shame. And that shame led to his death. Jesus didn’t shame Peter - he used conviction to bring Peter home after he broke his promise. It’s kind of like a GPS in your car. If you miss a turn you were supposed to take - the GPS doesn’t get mad at you. It doesn’t guilt you or try to shame you. And it never gives up on you. If you remember in the olden days, with those garmin - it would just say “recalculating.” You missed a turn, and the enemy wants to use that notification to shame you into despair - to get you to give up, pull over, stop driving. But Jesus uses that notification to bring you home. Conviction comes for every single person who follows Jesus - but what we do with it makes all the difference. Will you let it lead you into shame? In a downward spiral? Or will you let it lead you into forgiveness, into actual freedom?

Because here’s the thing, and this is the whole point of the whole message - We break promises, God never does. We break promises. We disappoint. We fall short. We sin. God never does. God has kept every promise he has ever made. We worship the only one who never breaks a promise. God promised Abraham that “all the peoples on earth will be blessed” through your offspring. I’ll give you a hint (whisper) - that’s about Jesus. Jesus is from the line of Abraham and he is God’s blessing to the ENTIRE world. God promised David that his royal dynasty and kingdom would be established forever, that a king of kings would come from his line (That’s about Jesus TOO. Jesus is from the line of David, which is from the line of Abraham). God promised Isaiah that one day a virgin would conceive a son, and he will be called Immanuel, which means “God with us” - (wind up to whisper - you get it.). Jesus is the fulfillment of every promise God ever made. The ultimate promise keeper. He lived a sinless life - even though he was tempted, just like you and I are. He followed God’s commands perfectly, even though he didn’t really want to (you might remember the whole garden of gethsemane prayer where Jesus literally cries out, “Lord, please let this cup pass from me - I don’t want to endure this pain.”) But he obeyed. He kept his promise to bring us salvation. He died on the cross for our sins - giving us, once and for all, access to true and radical freedom. You take the broken efforts of a promise breaker (point at yourself), and replace them with the perfect accomplishment of the one and only promise keeper (point up). 

Application

So let’s make this practical - if you want to find freedom in your walk with God, like Peter did - I have two challenges for you this week. First - you have to figure out what your shackles are made of. If you want to find freedom, you have to first identify the sin that is holding you back. What are the cage bars made out of? The chains that have you bolted to the floor of your old life - what are those sinful habits that you need to get rid of? Now that can be sort of tricky - because a lot of us, before we started hanging out with Jesus, we didn’t even realize that we were wearing the chains. But when the Holy Spirit shows up in our life, and brings his buddy Conviction along for the ride - it’s like scales fall from our eyes and we can see our life with clarity. Like, if you’re in a relationship - but you’re also looking at pornography on the side. Maybe you didn’t think that was a big deal, but Jesus teaches us to avoid lust. Only have desire for your spouse. Well, once you know that - that’s a shackle you need to get rid of. Or maybe it’s something financial - you were raised with a mentality: make as much money as you can, money is status, money is power, money is stability. But then we’ve got all these teachings from Jesus about how the love of money is really toxic to our heart, and all this encouragement to live a life of generosity, giving to church, helping other people. Once you know that - that’s a shackle you need to unlock from your wrist. [pull out phone] Or maybe it’s connected to this thing. And you spend a lot of your life scrolling, looking at other people, wishing you could be them, wishing you could look like them, wishing you could have what they have - and that little green envy monster is growing up in your heart. But Jesus teaches us about contentment, and not coveting and once you know that - you’ve got a shackle to unlock. 

So figure out what your shackles are made of - but you might be thinking, “How do I figure out what they are?” I’m so glad you asked - here’s three easy ways. 1. Read your bible. The whole thing would be great, but if you’re just getting started - start with Jesus’ teachings. The more you learn about the teachings and life of Jesus - the more you learn about the kingdom of heaven that he was always talking about, the more you will see where your heart is compared to what he has for you. 2. Ask the Holy Spirit. It’s actually a really easy prayer - “Holy Spirit, please show me my shackles. Convict me of my sin. Shine a big ol’ spotlight on every dark spot in my heart. Lord, please show me - and then after you pray, pay attention to what he says back. I have prayed this prayer over and over in my life, and every time God shows me something that was going on in my heart that was keeping me away from Him. 3. Ask a brother or sister in Christ. Now I’m going to say - this one should only be for people who have someone in their life who is trusted and beloved and can speak hard truths to you in love, and you won’t get all mad. I don’t want you going home this week and asking your spouse, “Hey, what shackles do you think I struggle with” - and then you get all huffy and defensive when they try to speak truth into your life. But if you’ve got a small group or an accountability partner or a prayer partner - ask the people around you “what are my shackles made of? How can I grow to be more like Jesus?” First challenge that will help you find freedom: Figure out what your shackles are made of. Second challenge that I want you to work on this week - find your rooster. I know that sounds dumb, but think about it - in the story of Peter, the rooster was an accountability device. It was a reminder of the promise Peter had made, the promise that he broke. So if your shackle is alcohol abuse, your rooster is Alcoholic’s Anonymous. Right? You need to join a community to help you stay accountable. Once you know the sins you struggle with, the things you want to be free of - put something in place to keep you accountable. Find your rooster. If you’re struggling with lust or wandering eyes - there’s actually programs you can put on your phone and on your screens, like covenant eyes or vid angel that will filter what you can see and help you stay on track. If you’re struggling with envy or too much time on your phone comparing yourself on social media - maybe your rooster is setting screen time limits. Sometimes the rooster could just be telling a few friends about your goals: hey, I’m really struggling with sinful anger and I want find freedom from that - will you help me? And then have them text you once or twice a week, “hey, have you been keeping your anger in check this week? Cockadoodledoo!” Whatever your shackles are made of, find your rooster who will remind you of the promises you’ve made. 

Now I’m going to ask the worship team to come up and close us out with an AMAZING last song. But while they’re coming up, I want to re-read Romans 7 for you one last time. But I want to add the first sentence of the last verse. I left it off last time. [read ROmans 7:15-25a] Let’s pray.